This page started with a note from a friend:
I agree with our Native American population—I am highly insulted by the racially charged name of the Washington Redskins. One might argue that to name an athletic sports team after Native Americans would exalt them as warriors, but nay nay….
We must be careful not to offend, and in the spirit of political correctness and courtesy, we must move forward.
Let’s ditch The Kansas City Chiefs, The Atlanta Braves and the Cleveland Indians. If your shorts are in a wad because of the reference the name Redskins makes to skin color, then we need to get rid of the Cleveland Browns.
The Carolina Panthers obviously were named to keep the memory of the militant Blacks from the 60’s alive. Gone. Offensive to us white folk.
The New York Yankees offend the Southern population. Do you see a team named for the Confederacy? No! There is no room for any reference to that tragic war between the states that cost this country so many young men’s lives.
Besides, the South shall rise again!!
I am also offended by the blatant references to the Catholic religion among our football team names. Totally inappropriate to have the New Orleans Saints, Los Angeles Angels or the San Diego Padres. The fact that there are birds on their shirts does not protect either the Arizona or the St. Louis Cardinals—gone!
Then there are the team names that glorify criminals who raped and pillaged as their way of life. We are talking the horrible Oakland Raiders, the Minnesota Vikings, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and the Pittsburgh Pirates!
Now, let us address those teams that clearly send the wrong message to our children—and it is all about the children.
The Green Bay Packers and the St. Louis Rams–promote gay men. Wrong message to our children.
The San Diego Chargers promote irresponsible spending habits. Wrong message to our children.
The New York Giants and the San Francisco Giants promote obesity–a growing childhood epidemic. Wrong message to our children.
The Cincinnati Reds promote downers/barbiturates. Wrong message to our children.
The Milwaukee Brewers—well, that goes without saying…. Wrong message to our children.
So, there you go. We need to support any legislation that comes out to rectify this travesty, because the government will likely become involved with this issue, as they should. A high priority directly behind efficiently managing our country’s health care. Amen.
Of Course I Could Not Leave Well Enough Alone:
Well, you might as well throw the Buffalo Bills into this mix. That great white hunter Buffalo Bill killed all the buffalos to deprive the indians of food and shelter. Baaaad. Real baaaad. If you didn’t know that, you must be unusual if you enjoy paying bills (groaner…)
But don’t worry, you can still root for the Seattle Seahawks and Mariners, unless you feel sorry for fish; for the New York Jets and Mets, but what’s the use? or for the Boston Red Sox, but being second best year after year after year just boring.
How about the Boston Patriots and the Philadelphia Eagles? Oops, no; eagles are our national symbol and therefore offensive to pinkos and illegals; ditto “patriots.”
But rejoice, Dorothy can still love her Detroit Lions, Tigers and Chicago Bears — unless PETA has any objections, that is…
Ditto for the Philadelphia Phillies and Eagles, Cincinnati Bengals, Jacksonville Jaguars, Chicago Cubs, Baltimore — oops — Indianapolis Colts, Denver Broncos, Atlanta Falcons, Toronto Blue Jays, Baltimore Orioles and Ravens, Miami Marlins and Dolphins, even the Arizona snakes. What? Calling them D-backs makes snakes less repulsive?
How about the Pittsburgh Steelers? You are right to have your suspicions about a team that uses the US Steel corporate logo as their own. Do they represent the corporation or the union? Is Pittsburgh even a steel town anymore?
What about the Dallas Cowboys, Texas Rangers, Houston Texans and Astros? If you are a PC purist, these four are kinda suspicious too. They are from Texas, after all.
You can forget the Chicago White Sox; isn’t “white” racist? It doesn’t help any that they were victims of the “curse of the black sox” for 85 years. That’s right, heap more abuse on African-Americans…
The Tampa (Bay?) Rays used to be the Devil Rays; no, we can’t promote satanism either. Oh, wait… they started winning only after they dropped “devil'” from their name. Just don’t interpreted this in any way as some kind of religious, let alone Christian, salvation.
What the heck are Minnesota “Twins“? Doesn’t that sound like discrimination against all others who have no twins? Anyway, the name is illogical. There are 25 of them, too, just like all the other teams, so even if their manager eh, …managed to get twelve sets of twins to play baseball, that still leaves one of them not a “twin,” ha ha ha.
And what the heck are Los Angeles “Dodgers“? They predate the draft-dodging Sixties by many decades; but who remembers stuff that happened before they were born? And it’s been a while since Angelinos had to dodge bullets on the freeway, so I don’t know what they’d be dodging now, except maybe the Giants. (Just had to get that one in. These two rivals have a habit of winning in the other team’s park.)
If you are desperate enough, you can root for the Colorado Rockies. How desperately original; imagine, mountains have rocks…Oh, I love mountains, but this is a baseball team. I can just hear it. MVP outfielder “Pikes” Peak goes back! Way back! He crashes through the retaining wall! He makes another fantastic catch! Game over! Quick, name another 24 mountains in the Colorado Rockies.
The San Francisco 49ers obviously represent everything the politically correct crowd hates about America. Manifest destiny — an excuse for imperialist conquest. Gold — timeless symbol of greed. What a joke it is that their home is San Francisco… (69ers would be more appropriate today.)
The Titans may be playing in Tennessee, but “titans”? That name carries no better connotations than “49ers.” And don’t forget, they used to be called the Houston Oilers… What can be more un-PC than oil…
We used to have Senators we could be proud of (that changed with the reign of Harry Reid) but now we have the Washington Nationals. Whether you call them (g)nats or nazis, for short, either one is a very appropriate name for today’s D.C and the crowd inhabiting it.
Yupp, everything is politics, eventually. What a damned era we live in.
But look where this got us. There is only one team name that can’t possibly raise any objections by the PC police. Just ONE, out of SIXTY TWO. Oh YUCCCH. It’s the Rockies…